Law school'd

Well, it certainly has been an interesting first few days. I just finished my first day of law school! I'm on my way to being a lawyer! I have no idea what I'm doing!

The University of Texas actually uses this picture to promote their law library. Awesome.

This Saturday was the first get-together for our first year mentor group. In most law schools, the first year is divided into sections that take all the same classes. Because UT is such a large law school, they break up the sections into two societies and each society into two mentor groups, so we finally end up with a group of about 30 people that we'll see every day for the rest of our lives (or so it seems). Not surprisingly, each mentor group has a second year mentor, and we had out party on Saturday at our mentor, Danny's, house. Burgers, hot dogs, beer and 100-degree-plus heat. What more could you ask for? The party was good in the sense that we got to meet people before the first day of orientation.

Orientation, Day 1:
We go to the law school bright and early for probably the best breakfast spread I've ever seen and to pick up our orientation packets. After awkwardly mingling for 20 minutes or so, we head on over to the LBJ auditorium for a few hours' worth of professors and alumni about how great it is to be at UT, how great our professors are, how smart we are, etc. After free pizza for lunch in our mentor group, we had a career services presentation and - get this - we are basically guaranteed to pass and guaranteed to get a job after graduation. Sweet! As they kept telling us, Monday marked the first day of our legal career. So what do we do? After a BBQ dinner provided to us with free beer (!), we all went out and got drunk at Buffalo Billiards and played pool and darts. This is the future of our country.

Orientation, Day 2:
A few more speeches about how great we all are, that lawyers are not horrible people, despite the jokes and popular perception. According to a Gallup poll from last December, lawyers rank 18th in terms of people's perceptions of honorable and ethical careers, just barely above Congressmen and used car salesmen. In Russia, on the other hand, a recent poll of high school students shows that lawyers are considered the second most honorable profession, behind accountants. They also ranked contract killers and racketeering 16th out of 38. This was only technically half a day, so I managed to get home in time for Dr. Phil (very important).

Today:
First day of school! Today is a late day, so I didn't get up until around 9 (God, I would never wake up that early in undergrad), went to Criminal Law, had lunch and went to Contracts. Both professors seem good and nothing too hard for today. The work isn't too bad... yet. We'll talk in about a week.

The funny thing about law school is that everyone is very anxious to make time to blow off steam. Tomorrow, we have a society-sponsored happy hour at Scholz's Beer Garden, next Tuesday we have a boat party with free booze, and next Thursday is the Student Bar Association back to school party with free beer at Buffalo Billiards. I'm thinking with enough booze flowing in, it won't be too bad a year.

Austin for good!

As I write this, it is Sunday night, my parents are gone, and I am officially moved in to Austin! Tomorrow marks the first day of orientation for law school, which means getting up before noon. I don't know if I can handle this schedule.

Last night, we had a little "getting to know everyone in your first year section" party, hosted by our second year mentor. It was pretty good, and most of the people seem pretty nice and outgoing. There were the requisite hot dogs, burgers, and beer, and it would have been much more enjoyable had the temperature been under 90 degrees last evening. I would say the vast majority of people in my section are either from Houston or Dallas, so it's a bit of a change from ND. There's actually another Notre Dame kid in my section who also graduated 2005, but I had never met him before or even knew who it was. It was really funny because all night people were like, "Hey, Notre Dame, there's another guy here who went there!" It at least provided a good out for awkward conversations. "Oh, really? Well, I guess I should go find him."

Most of the first years are between 22 and 26, I think, but there are a few random 30- to 35-year-old people. I feel like I have absolutely nothing to talk about with them. At least that's how I feel right now. Maybe in a few weeks when we're all seeped in class-type stuff, we'll at least talk about that sort of thing.

It turns out that I can't illegaly connect my cable internet to my TV to get basic cable, so I guess I have to call Time Warner and "pay" for the service. Damn. For now I'm keeping myself entertained with the DVDs I brought. Which I've seen about 10 times each. Oh well, starting tomorrow I probably won't even have time for TV.

The 40-Year-Old Virgin

...is a baritone player. He plays his euphonium around the apartment. Coincidence? I think not.

Kim

Sorry to put a damper on a usually lighthearted/meaningless blog, but this is something I feel I need to write about.

I got my cat Kim as a birthday present when I was 10 years old. My parents took me to the Citizens for Animal Protection near my house and I got to pick her out. Through the years, she's been a great cat, playful but not violently ripping up the furniture and/or people (like some people's cats that I know). She just turned 12 years old last week, and seemed to still be doing really well for an older cat. No worries, until this week. Last week, we took Kim to the vet because they sent us a postcard saying she was due for a physical checkup. As of last Wednesday, she seemed perfectly healthy and even doing very well for a cat her age. This weekend, we noticed that she wasn't eating, so we took her to the vet yesterday. They said early prognosis was dehydration and they wanted to keep her to put her on an IV and rehydrate her, it was probably some sort of kidney infection. Today the vet called and said that her kidneys are failing and is down to less than half of a kidney working properly. They want to continue the fluid treatment, and if her blood test levels (whatever that means) come down to normal in a few days, she might be able to recover relatively well and carry on for a few years. But, if no improvement shows, then the best thing to do would be to put her to sleep. I don't know why I'm so upset about an animal, but the news is incredibly unexpected. I know it seems silly to pray for an animal when so many other things are going on, but I really am praying for her. I am not looking forward to leaving to Austin on Friday.

Spam-tastic

Somehow my comments exploded in popularity. Turns out they were just comment spammers who somehow found my blog. Sorry to have to do this to you faithful commenters (mostly Eliz and Phil), but I'm putting up that "read this word and type it in" thing before you comment to detract the spammers.

In movie reviews, this weekend I went and saw Wedding Crashers and March of the Penguins. I know, I'm a little late on both, but you'll get my opinion anyway. Wedding Crashers was top-notch. Not just good for a Frat Pack movie, but hilarious in its own right. Hopefully I'll find my own Wilson Brothers/Wes Anderson group at Texas and latch on to them for prosperity's sake. I'll be swimming in big sacks of money by the time I'm 35, just like Scrooge McDuck. Quality quoting from this movie.

Secondly, I'd like to comment on March of the Penguins. First of all, I'd like to point to the "article" by Michael Bay on this week's The Onion. Now, on to the movie. It was pretty much what you would expect from a glorified documentary, many amusing shots of penguins being really cute. My complaint is that apparantly penguins die all the time. Pretty much everything they do puts them at risk of imminent death. And I know it's a documentary so it's supposed to be "real" and all, but it's a rated G movie for little kids! Could you not put the dying penguins in so many scenes? Honestly.

Hopefully this week I'll get to 40 Year Old Virgin and Red Eye, so I can report back. This is it, folks, once law school starts next Monday, I'll probably just talk about class. How sad.

Notre Dame, I miss thee

Sunday night I went over to Philip's house to say good-bye. It's pretty weird to think that he's going back along with Katie J and Erin, while I'm still here, waiting for another two weeks for school to start. I am pretty excited that I'll be starting law school, but not heading up to Notre Dame feels very odd to me. Saturday night I got together with Sarah, Sonal and Anglee, and we all agreed that graduating sucks. But, that meeting did help me see that there is life beyond ND and being at home isn't all bad.

I ordered my books online on Sunday. Correction - $600 for four classes - technically three classes and a once a week seminar. Thanks, law school, for putting me into bankruptcy. Once my student loans come through (not for another week or so), I can finally pay off my parents and the tuition and stuff I owe, plus hopefully I can start paying rent and utilities without dipping into my savings account.

In other news , I am very seriously considering going to Notre Dame for the USC game, October 15th. It should be at a time where things aren't too hectic, and the next weekend is my birthday so my parents will probably want me to hang out with them, or some crap like that, so that really looks like the best option. Now I just need tickets and a place to stay! So, to all you out there that read this - start looking. (And, if you don't live in South Bend anymore, but are an alumni that is considering going back for a football game - go back for USC so I can see you!)

As the soundtrack to Avenue Q so eloquently states - "I wish I could go back to college"

Blabbity blah

Once upon a time, a blog used to be a place for incoherent ramblings and the deepest, darkest secrets of one's soul. I think I may be placing too much emphasis on the "what I did today" aspect and less on the "incoherent rambling" aspect, so here you have it, some useless stuff to think about.

1) How come Sam Waterson has stayed on as assistant D.A. for several years on Law and Order, while his female counterpart seems to change like a revolving door of hussies in the New York District Attorney's office? Also, what is Fred Thompson's real job on Law and Order? All I ever see him do is grumble some sage advice for about thirty seconds an episode. If only I could be paid the big bucks for grumbling advice for 30 seconds.

2) The point I wish to make here is more clearly articulated in Michael Ian Black's article for McSweeny's magazine. The only funny person on I Love the 80's other than Hal Sparks has done it again. If you enjoy McSweeny's, you would love A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius, by Dave Eggers. It's basically an autobiography of how his parents died when he was in college and how he raised his little brother and started this hilarious magazine and now he's uber-rich. But it's funny and comes with drawings, so I likes it. Anyway, back to the main issue: Have you ever eaten a baby?

3) Have any of you seen those commercials for Pillsbury biscuits where you just use two at a time? In order to come up with this genius idea, the Pillsbury doughboy goes undercover to discover that - suprise! - people tend to pair up. Only, the Pillsbury doughboy's undercover work means spying on couples at their most intimate times. It's really quite disturbing, and I frankly believe that he should be put away for being a peeping tom.

4) Last year, The Onion came out with a review of dollar-store food that caused massive wetting due to laughing. It seems to have become an annual review, and let me tell ya, this year's doesn't dissapoint. Some of the "scariest ingredients" will be with me till I die.

5) My optometrist says that they're discontinuing my brand of contacts. I don't like my new ones.

Computey

I am typing this from my brand new computer, a lappy for law school. It's... uh... a Toshiba... and... it's friggin' sweet is alls I know. Actually, it's a Toshiba Satellite and I'm pretty sure it's more powerful than my desktop. No more being tied down by my giant desktop! I can update from anywhere, suckers!

It's official

Whether I like it or not, I am officially starting law school August 31. Well, technically there's orientation for two days before, but who's counting. Besides me. Who is anxiously counting until that day. I'm signed up for three classes (Civil Procedure, Criminal Law I, and Contracts) and one Legal Research and Legal Writing seminar. Overall, it's not a bad schedule, except my Civil Procedure class is Mondays and Tuesdays from 8:30 to 10:20, so those will probably be brutal.

This weekend, I went to Austin to move furniture and things into my apartment. In the process, I came out with about fifty mosquito bites from moving the washer and dryer (apparantly Austin is now a swamp?) and a number of scrapes and bruises from assembling my desk. Between the almost getting hit by lightening in Houston and the multiple injuries in Austin, I think God is trying to tell me to get out of Texas.

Speaking of getting out of Texas, now that I know I don't have any afternoon classes on Friday, I'm considering going to a football game this season. Anyone know which games they'll be heading to South Bend for? Let me know!

Tejas

What is it about Texas that makes all of its residents so crazy about it? Sure, we're pretty friggin' huge and there's a lot of good, unique things about Texas, but what could it be that makes everyone so maniacally devoted to the Lone Star state?

When I was in high school, I was really into punk and ska for some reason, and when going to see The Suspects, a local ska band, one of the opening bands was Bowling for Soup. Now they're famous for their catchy pop-punk songs, such as the one where they list all those things from 1985. Man, that's hilarious! Anyway, Bowling for Soup has recently added a song to the collection of songs about Texas, and - you guessed it - it lists all sorts of things from Texas. Booya!

Come back to Texas
Its just not the same since you went away
Before you lose your accent
and forget all about the Lone Star State
There's a seat for you at the rodeo
and I've got every slow dance saved
Besides the Mexican food sucks north of here anyway

Troy Aikmen wants you back
Willie Nelson wants you back
NASA wants you back
and the Bush twins want you back
and Pantera wants you back
and Blue Bell wants you back

A little breather

Here it is, folks, the wrap-up from my trip to Washington DC and New York! I don't want to bore you to death, so here are the highlights.

DC
Without a doubt, the International Spy Museum is one of the greatest museums, nay, the greatest attraction in Washington, D.C. It just makes you feel like James Bond. Unfortunately, we were in DC just in time for the Boy Scout's annual Jamboree so there were huge groups of awkward teenagers who knew they looked silly in their Boy Scout uniforms all over the place. Also, Ford's Theatre was pretty cool because I learned that John Wilkes Booth was considered one of the most attractive and best known actors of his time. Sort of like if Johnny Depp were to pop a cap into Dubya. Oh yeah, I went there. Also, the first night we went to an Astros-Nationals game, which was cool because I got to see Roger Clemens pitch. And we creamed the Nationals.

Alas, our time in DC was short, and soon we were off on the sketchy China Town bus to New York. Our first night there, we met up with the infamous Gregory Bonsignore of TAAS: The Musical Revue fame and go to dinner in his neighborhood of Little Italy, followed by the most bizarre dessert idea ever - a shop dedicated purely to rice pudding. You can even order it online by the pound. We think the owners intended to put in an ice cream place, but spent all their money on decorating it like an Apple store, and somehow stumbled across a literal ton of rice in the basement which then led to the rice pudding idea.


The next day was our Yankee Stadium tour. All I can say is: flippin' sweet. We got to go into Monument Park, walk across the field, hang out in the dugout and then go up to the pressbox. AND we got a free key chain! I'm pretty sure I'm sitting where Derek Jeter usually sits. In the following days, we saw Rent on Broadway, which was very good except that the guy who played Mark was hell-bent on being original in his interpretation, and it ended up being the wrong interpretation. But other than him, it was pretty awesome. Times Square, a Yankee game on Thursday, and for the big finale, a trip to the Museum of Television and Radio. It's pretty much the greatest idea in the world for a museum. They have a few special screenings each day, and when we went they had a special on how teenagers are portrayed on television throughout history, and, more importantly, a showing of Are You Afraid of the Dark? The answer to that my friends, is hells yes, it's still pretty scary. The best part, however, is going to the media library and searching from hundreds of episodes of TV they have stored away to select four episodes of any show you want to watch. I picked a Very Special Doogie Howser, M.D. where Doogie loses his virginity. It was... pretty awkward. I also saw an episode of Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego, the pilot for The Wonder Years and an episode of Degrassi where Spike learns that she's preggers. Just don't tell Anglee I said that because she hates the word preggers.

Alas, the fun in the city had to come to an end. We took the sketchy China Town bus back to DC (never again will I take a China Town bus... anything I write right now would not do justice to the heinousness of the situation). But just trust me on that. And this morning, at an ungodly hour, we were back at Reagan airport - just to give you an idea, we were in Houston by 10am, and we had a stopover.

What's next on the agenda? Apartment shopping, hopefully having a few Tejas falto bashes in Austin before everyone heads out and getting used to being back in the south. Oh, and watching Degrassi every possible moment.

Back in the States

I have just returned from a 3-week vacation to visit family and generally laze around Monterrey, Mexico. In addition to some quality music, including the new Shakira single, which I heard approximately 57,826 times, Mexico has a lot going for it. Like the food. Oh, baby. I'm glad I don't live in Mexico for the sole reason that I would weigh about 400 pounds. Then again, I may be able to shake my bootay, Shakira-style from seeing that video so often.

While seeing such quality movies in theatres like War of the Worlds and Fantastic Four, I also saw some quality movies on TV such as Karate Kid and Bossa Nova. When you have no mode of transportation, you get kind of desperate for entertainment. It looks like we left just in time before Hurricane Emily destroyed Mexico. See ya later, Mexico!

Now I am back in Houston for about 2 days before I head off to Washington, DC and New York City. In some cruel twist of irony, Greg Bonsignore will be in Houston for half of the week that we are in New York. We still get to see him for a couple of days, but COME ON.

After that, it's off to Austin and decorating my apartment! Weeee.

Adios, amigos

Tomorrow my family and I take off on another "vacation" to Mexico, which will as always be one big realtive-fest. My grandmother is throwing my parents a 25th wedding anniversary party, and it will be a Very Big Deal, so up until that is over, I think it will be a very stressful time for me. Because naturally, if my mom is stressed, she expects me to help her out while my brother watches Mexican TV and eats candy like he's eight years old.

Looks like from here on out, I'll be travelling around like crazy.

Mexico dates: June 23 - July 16 or so
Moving in (Austin): July 18-20th-ish
DC/New York: July 22(ish) - August 1(ish)

And sometime after that, I hope to have many visitors in Austin, as it is the setting of this years' Real World and overall the best place in Texas to visit.

Try not to miss me too much when I'm gone, and feel free to e-mail me, since they actually have that intra-net thing at my relatives' house.

Happy Birthday Phil, Father's Day and Juneteenth

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We're the sneakiest sneaks that ever sneaked

Today, my best friend Laurie and I embarked on a shopping adventure. After hitting up the Galleria for some out-of-our-price-range shopping, we went to dinner at a Chili's nearby where we got FREE dessert since they screwed up her order. Afterwards, being the hooligans we are, we went searching for a retail store that was still open after the hour of 9pm. Finding no luck at the Sketchers outlet, we went to Ikea for some decorative baskets Laurie needed. After pulling into a nearly-empty parking lot, we decided to forgo the traditional "entrance" and go in through the exit. Ooooh. The baskets she needed were right by the checkouts, so we got her things and checked out around 9:30, a full half-hour after the store had closed. Those fools didn't even know we snuck in after closing time. We should be international spies. Really.

And thus concluded another crazy night in Houston.

Tae Bo - more like Tae No

Exercising in the summer in Houston is a problem for me. Two summers ago I joined a gym, which was fine, but they kept charging me after my summer was up - not a happy experience, and I'm not even going to be home all this summer. (For those of you who may remember from my previous blog, it was also a breeding ground for old men to stare while I used the leg muscle machines that look inappropriate). A few summers ago, I tried to go running at 8 am, before it got too hot. Needless to say, it's physically impossible to go out "before it's too hot", because even at 8, 7, or 5 am, it's still over 80 degrees with miserable humidity, rendering it impossible to exercise without feeling like a sweaty gym sock and/or passing out. Also, who gets up at 8 am?! The treadmill we have at home is fine, but a little old and boring. So, for fun, I decided to try out one of those Tae-Bo tapes (well, DVDs) that everyone keeps raving about. After all, Kt R likes it and my old RA Liz swore by it. So I pick up a DVD with a very sweaty Billy Blanks on the cover promising an effective cardio workout and all the other magic things Tae Bo promises to give you, such as the ability to fly or kill an attacker with a paper clip. I tried it out the other day, and good lord. I lasted fifteen minutes before the light headedness and passing out started to kick in. I'm hoping to build up, but for now, I hurt too much to move.

In other news, I finally went and saw Star Wars on Saturday. Our friends picked the theatre, and it ended up being on IMAX which was pretty cool, but unnecessarily expensive, in my opinon. The movie itself - well, just as Alex and Stork put it when I asked them how it was, "It was... evil." A little depressing, I suppose, but pretty entertaining. All I know is I'm looking forward to Batman Begins beause I love me some Christian Bale.

Joyful News!

Oh yes, it's joyful news indeed. The first and most important (in my opinion) piece of joyful news is that my favorite TV show currently on the air, Arrested Development, has been renewed for a third full season. In my opinion, Arrested Development is the best show on TV and highly underappreciated. So it makes me do my happy dance to hear that it's being continued. Thanks to Dooz for filling me in on info that I already knew, but had yet to share with you all.

Secondly, and important in the sense that I won't be homeless, is that I found an apartment to live in next year! After a rigorous two-day search around pretty much the entire Austin metropolitan area, I found a super sweet apartment complex in the Far West area that I lurrrrved. It's really spacious and completely remodeled and right by a ton of stuff to do. Wahoo! So, if you ever want to come visit Austin, you'll have a place to stay! And it isn't a cardboard box! There may not be any "furniture" per se, but there will be plenty o' floorspace ;-) So, stage one of me moving to Austin has been finalized, and I get to move in on July 14.

One thing I noticed in my trip to Austin is that every waiter I had, including the IHOP waiters were super friendly and nice. And I mean, it must be a huge struggle for IHOP waiters to be nice because let's face it, they're not expecting any huge tippers. Perhaps everyone is Houston is just crabby. I guess you would be too if it were 100 degrees outside with 100% humidity. Or maybe we're just bad tippers.

Summertime and it feels all right

Well, chilluns, I feel obligated to apologize that I haven't updated my blog in so long. I know many of you, especially now in the summer months that you most of you are working jobs that require little or no work, depend on meaningless things to pass the time such as blogs. And to you, I say... I'm sorry I let you down.

So, just as a sign of how much I let ya down, here's a list of things that have happened since I last updated:
1) Kentucky Derby
2) Senior week
3) Graduation
4) Trip to Disney

All those were well and good. Kentucky Derby was a ridiculous mess of people staying at Stevo's house and getting ridiculously drunk the day of the Derby. I think I may have seen one horse for less than a minute in the entire 6 hours I was there. I did, however, see EVERYONE I KNOW from Notre Dame. It's true. Senior week was exactly like you wish college could be all the time, scheduled drinking and seeing all your friends minus the classes. Graduation was a super busy and anticlimactic weekend. I literally hugged some friends after the ceremony and said, "Well... see ya... never." Trust me, it's way weirder being the graduate than the younger friend of the graduate. After that, it was off to Florida for my first trip ever to Disney World!* Again, lots of fun but so anti-climactic at the end. College has no closure, I've decided.

The day after I got back from Florida was my dad's birthday. I had nothing better to do, so I, with my own BARE HANDS made a cake and even made the frosting from scratch! I am awesome. And no, it didn't kill anyone.

For now, I am trying to stretch out about a week's worth of work into the whole summer. Because let's face it folks, having the summer off is a great deal and all, but after a while... you kinda get bored. Especially since most of your friends don't live in the city. My latest project is Clean Sweeping my room, TLC style. Except they get a whole team of experts to go through their junk for them, and pay for the redecorating of their room. I have my mom and an unwilling brother. Sweet.

Side note: I am highly recommending the movie Crash, out in theatres right now.

And finally my friends, I leave you with this - The identity of Deep Throat (now that can start its own slew of jokes) recently has been revealed. To anyone other than CNN - is this really a shock? And what has changed now that we know his identity?

G. Gordon Liddy thinks his actions were wrong and "morally incorrect". Thanks, G. Gordon Liddy. Did you think of that when you were in prison, or just now that he revealed himself?

*OK so technically I went to Epcot with the band for the Gator Bowl. But Epcot is NOT Disney World!

Jigga yeah

OK so I've been really bad at updating, so here are a few things going on in my world right now:

Spring break was excellent, a nice food-filled vacation to Tejas to experience all that we have to offer, especially llamas at the zoo. I don't think the little kids got it when we were yelling "Tina, eat your food!" at them. Another highlight was the medicated animals petting zoo. The Houston Zoo redid their whole kids area, and now have a very large pen full of cute little baby goats and sheep and kind barnyard animals of that nature. Except, they didn't move. Little kids were running everywhere, petting them, generally making a lot of noise, and these animals looked as if they'd overdosed on Valium. One dad even made the comment to us, "I wonder what they put in their food".

As of right now, the Dome is having a cage built around it so it can be reguilded. Which means at graduation, we will definitely have scaffolding all over the dome, and it might even be some sort of weird color if they already start taking the gold off. Way to care about the students, administration.

In other remodeling news, I think both Philip and Adam would be glad to be out of Dillon this semester. It is constantly surrounded by large machines and people on those machines power washing the walls of Dillon. Forget about sleeping in or taking a nap.

No one else may care, but I won an iPod mini from the PAC! You spend enough time in one building, it starts to get its rewards.

Spring Break WOO

After probably the two longest and busiest weeks of my LIFE, it's finally spring break (woo!). Tomorrow I head off to Tejas with some bandies. Really, it's the best of both worlds. I go to sunnier climates, get to stay at home and eat for free, and my friends come with me to entertain me. Booya. We're going to go to Galveston for a day, visit San Antonio, go to NASA, and, most importantly, go to the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo!! My first time to go was in high school, and I had a fantastic time, and I haven't been back since senior year of high school when I saw that man-hunk Enrique Iglesias... what an apropos singer for the Rodeo, right? So I'm pumped for that.

Also, today, I saw George W. Bush speak in the JACC! I entered the student ticket lottery, and apparantly out of 1,500 students who entered, I got one of 100 winning tickets! Jenna and I went this afternoon, and after a unnecessarily long security line, we headed up to the bleachers. It was awesome. Georgie is quite the charmer, and it's pretty funny just to hear him go off on tangents because he doesn't have to worry about reelection anymore, so he just says whatever the hell he wants. Outside the JACC, across the street, was a pretty big group of protestors, which included Katie and Emily. I waved at Katie as we came out... I don't think she was too pleased by it. One old guy coming out yelled "Get a job!!" at them, and I cracked up. Because, old angry people are funny.