Grood. Great and good.

1) Congrats to Brian and Katie Vnak for having twins! Holy crap, my friends have kids! I'm getting old! Hooray for babies.

2) I got my Religious Liberties grade today, which in itself is fine. However, I will now be checking the grades website obsessively until they are all up. D.Freeman, you send me so many e-mails, can't you be on top of this instead?

3) I'm leaving tomorrow for Mexico, suckers! Screw you, rainy Houston. I'll be gone for about a week (hopefully back by Wednesday) and then will be off to South Bend on Friday for the Animal House reunion. So what if I'm the only falto there? I'm sure I won't get wrecked because of that.

Memorial Day... a day to be stuck in traffic

So, as promised, I went back to Austin this weekend to attempt to get some of my stuff together. Man, do I have a lot of crap. I got there Friday and promptly went to see X-Men 3, which was pretty good. Seeing as I went opening night, I didn't know about the super-secret extra scene, and frankly, I wanted to get out of the claustrophobic theater ASAP. Did you know the Gateway Cinema doesn't have stadium seating? How are they still in business? I guess it's been a while since I've gone to see one of the big summer movies on opening night... the lines, the nerds in costume... I don't think it's quite for me.

Saturday I went to San Antonio to check out the apartment I'm subletting for the summer. It's decent, right in the middle of the medical district. Acceptable for two months. Apparently there's a little bit of crime in the area, but hey, at least I'm right next to a bunch of hospitals! I'll just walk to the emergency room, save me the ambulance fee. Also, it's right near a pool hall called "Nice Rack". BONG.


That night, I went back to Austin and met up with Miguel, his brother, and a bunch of his brother's friends at Shakespeare's downtown. I also ran into two girls from high school there, which was okay, I guess, but I still get weirded out because man, if I don't see you for four years, you pretty much stop existing in my book. After Shakespeare's, Miguel and I got brats from the Best Wurst stand on 6th street. That's like an institution. And we made friends with the girl behind us who kept pushing us becuase "You can't let those people cut in line!!!" What people? Who knows.

Sunday was lazing, followed by the best drive ever in stop and go traffic on 290 on Monday on the way home. Laurie got a "day off" for Memorial Day, so they let her use her cell phone in basic training, and she called and we got to talk for about an hour, which was super great. Apparently she loves it, and is labeled an "expert" in grenades and "sharpshooter" in M-16s. Hear that, people? My best friend can kill you with her bare hands... don't mess.

Fun with pictures

If Ernie Young.....



mated with John Dzienkowski....



What would they produce?

Extended hiatus

I've gotten complaints that I'm not updating enough to your liking. The truth is, I've been in Houston for a week and a half or so, and there is literally nothing to do. I watch a lot of TV. I help my mom cook dinner. That's about it.

My dad's birthday was on Tuesday. We got him a sander and a stereo. And we had brownies and ice cream that night.

See what I mean, people? Do you want more of that? Do you?

I'm heading back to Austin tomorrow, which should provide more craziness than now. Things to do, people to see. Or things to see, such as X-Men 3. That will be the highlight of my weekend. I am so not lying right now.

So, I've been rereading Scott Turow's "One L" to see just how full of shit he is. During orientation, we were told not to believe much of it, and in hindsight, they were right. They also said, "You know, if you don't want law school to be stressful, maybe you shouldn't attempt to write your first novel during your first year." Take that, Turow. Also, the 1Ls at Harvard are insane. Reading ahead? Reading law review artices about the case to have extra info in class? How can you complain about gunners when your entire class is some sort of race of super-gunners? God, I'll kill you, Harvard Law Class From 25 Years Ago! I can't even get myself to finish reading past their first finals.

So, I turn to TV instead. Does anyone else think Jorge Ramos is the Hispanic Anderson Cooper? Decide for yourselves.

Can't get enough Jason Bateman?

I know I can't. I just discovered the website Brilliant but Cancelled, which has the entirety of his pilot that never got picked up by NBC called The Jake Effect. It combines Jason Bateman and lawyers, what more could you want? And by you, I mean me. And the answer is nothing.

Edit: I suppose to make the sentence grammatically correct, I should probably say, "And by you, I mean I." But that sounds weird, doesn't it?

Blow me, Bureaucracy

Mother of God. 7 hours in a government office. Granted, it was not the US Government's office, it was the Mexican Consulate's office, but still - GOOD LORD. The only thing that stopped me from committing suicide was the lack of an object sharp enough, that and the judging from all those around me. The one bright spot is that I saw a guy with a hook for a hand! He was pretty entertaining, although I don't think he meant to be, and if he knew how many times I was staring at his hook, he would have impaled me with it. Damn, I should have made a bad hook joke, he would have put me out of my misery. There was also an employee who was wearing a red elastic-waistband jacket with the sleeves pushed up, Miami Vice-style. AND he was wearing a piano key necktie!
*Note!* Although this man is not wearing a piano key necktie, this is one of the first images that comes up when you search google. I like the fact that he is labeled an "objet d'art". Classy.

Anyway, after that, I had to go redo my fingerprints for the DOJ because, apparently, the first time I did them they were too dark but hopefully they will scan in that crazy, 2 million dollar machine of theirs. Suck it, bureaucracy.

So, some people have said they have gotten grades back. A-bwaaaah? Maybe it's just for upper level courses, because I'm still convinced there's at least a month left until we get ours.

Family Matters... no, Family Ties... wait...

When I was an undergrad at ND, coming home was an awesome experience. Having your kid over 1,000 miles away is pretty rough on parents, especially when I'm the first one in my entire family to go away to college. Naturally, when I came home, I was spoiled rotten. Mom would take me shopping, Dad would take us all out to eat, and it was pretty great to be home because all my other friends that went away to college were home then, too, so I could always call them up and go out with them.

Now, harsh reality is setting in. I now live a mere 3 hours from home, so coming home, while still nice, is not all that special. I think it hurts the pocketbook the most. Now that I'm in grad school, all the loans are in my name, and my parents say "well, you've got your own money, you don't need ours anymore!" Oh, god, I do. I do if I want to go shopping! Why would you deprive me of that?

Anyway, my point is, I am bored here at home, I don't have money to go shopping, and none of my friends are back yet. Someone entertain me!

I was always a sucker for Michael J. Fox as a young Republican in a tie....


Also, Jason Bateman's sister, who Jason Bateman had a strange obsession with having love scenes with..

I'm really making an effort

During the semester, when I have things to do, it's very easy to procrastinate doing those things by writing in this blog. For those of you who don't know, I finished my last exam Thursday and hence have no reason whatsoever to continue writing this blog. However, I'll make an attempt not to fall off the face of the earth, and once my job starts, I'll let you know all the immigration craziness I'll be dealing with, or as much as the government will allow me to say. For now, I have at least two weeks off until I start. When do I start, you ask? Yeah, that'd be nice to know. Um, if you could let me know sometime soon, Department of Justice, I could really use that info.

So, there was some craziness this weekend, but there is no way I could ever say it in as much detail or as hilariously as Animal, so I'm going to pull a Nips and just link to his blog and let you get that info from him.

Sunday I drove into Houston to see the family, because they miss me (who wouldn't really), and... I'm not sure what else. Today my big task was showering and eating before 3pm. And then I watched How I Met Your Mother (which is enraging me right now - more Barney, less weepy emotional stuff) and Grey's Anatomy (blah blah blah). So, in sum, I love vacation. Please don't make me go back to school.

I am not surprised

Find your own pose!

The law school version of '24'

That's right my friends, less than 24 hours and I will be DONE with finals and my first year of law school! It's been bittersweet, but I am ready to pound out 3 hours' of property tomorrow and then proceed to forget everything I learned in the past year at Crown and Anchor on Dzienkowski's dollar. Or really, Fulbright and Jaworski's dollar, since we are using all the money left over from the society program to fund our drunken giddy post-finals debauchery.

In other news, I bought these shoes recently, and can't wait to wear them. Steve Madden, you magnificent bastard. If I ever meet you, I will kiss you squaw on the lips. Even though, let's be honest, if you are designing shoes that fabulous, you're probably gay.



It would be fun for me to check back every hour so you know what I'm doing, a la 24. But I won't.

I totally agree

Strange habits #2

Eating habits go out of control around finals time. Some meals are skipped, others are eaten to maximum stuffed-ness of the belly. Prime example:

Today's meal: One DiGiornio personal pizza around 3:30pm. One small salad around 9pm.
Yesterday: Burger and fries around 1pm. Chinese food at 10pm.
The day before: Chicken nuggets and fries around noon. One of those Bird's Eye Viola meals around 8pm. By the way, Viola meals - best things in the world. I could live off of them.

Also, if you've noticed the vast majority of my meals have been from fast food restaurants. What can I say, I need fuel for my nervous energy. Besides the many lattes, which I can't even count.

Oh yeah, chocolate doesn't count as meals, but it's interspersed in there, too.

I wish I was a 3L and stopped caring about finals.

Strange habits

I have to answer some of Elizabeth's qualms about law school, and I also want to attempt to be a witty observer of law school. First of all, a difference between Scott Turow's "One L" experience is that they had year-long first year courses whereas all of UT's first year courses are only a semester long. This is good in the sense that you don't have a giant test at the end of the year covering everything, but sucks because the professors have to cram a year's worth of material into a semester. Poop.

Honestly, law school finals are hard, but they're not soul-crushing. Not. Quite. Okay, so maybe a little piece of me dies every time I write down my exam number, but depending on the person, you could either have a nervous breakdown or just have a tough two weeks that culminate in your property professor taking your entire class out for drinks, which isn't too shabby.

So, let me tell you a little bit about the different types of tests and some stereotypical "types" of test-takers for each.

1. Your typical 4-hour in-class exam. Almost all my tests last semester were like this. The first time you go through it, you have no clue what the time pressure is going to be like. Four hours is kind of a long time, and a lot of people have to pee in the middle of it. This one, basically everyone sits at their laptop and types for four hours straight, and if they have to pee, they strategically wait until they've finished a section, then make a made dash for the bathroom. It's like a race to see how quickly you can empty your bladder while taking some time to think of how you'll organize your next issue all at once.

2. 8-hour take-home. As noted below, the cruelest form of torture known to man. Some prefer to bring some small, yet healthy snacks in the library and sit in the same chair for 8 hours straight, print occasionally and spend the last half hour of their time editing and perfecting their prose. Others (like me) prefer to bring in their headphones, take multiple mini-breaks to check people's away messages and The Superficial, and leave the library for twenty minutes or so for a lunch break.

3. 24-hour take-home. First type of people will pick up the test promptly at 12pm (or whenever they can pick it up), work constantly for 7 hours, take a break and eat dinner, proofread their paper, and print it out at 9pm and go to bed. They will wake up early, read it over once more, and turn it in a good hour ahead, just in case there's traffic. Group 2 (me, again), will pick it up between noon and 1, decide to come home and immediately say, well... it's really time for lunch. And after lunch, we will look over the question. Then, oh my god, it's the episode of The Cosby Show where the guys are pregnant! Okay, I'll take a half hour to watch this, and THEN, really, then it's time to start writing. Okay, well, I also like this episode of Cosby Show, so I'll just leave it on while I look over the problem and sort of.. outline the answer. Four hours later, still staring at a blank screen. Eventually, around 5pm, the writing begins, at midnight you're ready to kill yourself, and you give up around 3am, while setting your alarm for 7 so you can finish up at the very last minute, park illegaly and rush to turn it in just under the wire.

This has been a total waste of time. If you want some REAL entertainment, check this out.

The Finals Countdown

If you're wondering why I haven't updated in a while it's because today was my first final. I am completely done with torts! I can totally sue someone for you. This test was an 8 hour take-home exam. I was at school today from 8am to a little after 4pm. I have come to the conclusion that 8 hour take-homes are the cruelest form of torture known to man. Just enough time to do a lot of work, but not enough to relieve the time pressure.

Mal came to visit last weekend, which was excellent. We saw the ridiculous houses on Lake Austin from Mount Bonnell, including many with boat garages, video games and general ticket-grabbing awesomeness at Dave and Buster's, and a trip to go see Stick It with every other 12-year-old in the Arboretum area. I put Stick It squarely in the middle between Center Stage and Bring It On, and if you say I stole that from Mike Lassaude, I will punch you in the face.



Finally, and most importantly, I must announce that MY softball team won the 1L Law School Softball Championship! Our picture is going up in Gregory Gym, and I got an uber-sweet "Intramural Champions" t-shirt to proclaim just how awesome I am. And by awesome, I mean totally sweet.